More Random Thoughts

That other post was so long, and yet my brain is still racing....


Today was the first day of school for the boys. J7 was excited. He made some new friends, and he liked his teacher. :) T12 is more apprehensive, unfortunately. I mean, 7th grade is a big deal. He's finally feeling it. He was stunned to see his Texas history book, lol. I just smiled as he looked at me so incredulously when he told me how thick that sucker is. Yes, T12, I remember taking Texas history. Also, that wasn't the ONLY hunk of book I had to carry around, almost every single day, to school AND back! Who needed weight-lifting class when I carried a backpack w/ a history book??

There are also "new" discipline issues that blow his mind, such as punishing the whole class over one or two disobedient students. This is one of those things I thought nothing about b/c I experienced that when I was in junior high. Thing is, we had a couple of absolute jerks (keeping this as G as possible, lol) who made classtime disruptive, and the entire class paid for their misdeeds. Growing up, I became aware of this use of discipline in the military...which sometimes has an amazing ability to straighten out the trouble-makers...I ain't talkin' 'bout the disciplinary action itself, I'm talkin' 'bout the resulting PEER discipline, if you know what I mean! I do remember that, like the military setting, after a couple of rounds of class discipline, the trouble makers didn't think it was quite so cool to upset the rest of the group, and there became no need for punishing the entire class for misdeeds of a couple of others.


Little prayer = little power
More prayer = more power
Much prayer = much power

There are a few things I've tried to teach my boys. Life's lessons, if you will:

Say what you mean, mean what you say. (side note~~J7 used to say it this way when he was a toddler: "Mean say! Mean say!!" It brings a smile to Hubby's and my face when we heard it. :) )

Don't tell secrets, and don't tell lies.

If someone is talking badly TO you about someone else, they'll talk badly ABOUT you to someone else, too.

Words have a nasty way of coming back to haunt you. An apology is not always enough.

Think on these things before you speak:

T~~Is what I'm thinking something thoughtful? or is it careless?

H~~Is what I'm thinking about something healing? or is it harmful?

I~~Is what I'm thinking about inspirational? or is it destructive?

N~~Is what I'm thinking about necessary? or is it hurtful?

K~~Is what I'm thinking about kind? or will it cause someone pain?

I don't claim to be the perfect mom. I'm just not. I don't even really consider myself a "good" mom. What I do know, however, is that I love my boys like I love no one else.

I don't claim to be the perfect wife. I'm just not. I don't even really consider myself a "good" wife. What I do know, however, is that I love my husband like I love no one else.

I don't claim to be the perfect daughter. I'm just not. I don't even really consider myself a "good" daughter. What I do know, however, is that I love my parents like I love no one else.

I don't claim to be a perfect friend. I'm just not. I don't even really consider myself a "good" friend. What I do know, however, is that I love my friends like I love no one else.

I don't claim to be a perfect person. I'm just not. I don't even really consider myself a "good" person. What I do know, however, is that my Lord loves me like no one else does. For THAT, I am eternally grateful. : )

God's love for me enables me to love the people around me in ways I'm too personally ignorant to know and show. It's God's love in me that enables me to treat others the way I'd like to be treated. God's love toward me enables me to forgive myself when I falter~~He sees me for me in the times I see myself as an unworthy failure. God's love lifts me out of myself and kicks my hind end to be with someone else in far more real dire straights than I imagined myself to be. His instructions are not grievous, tho they may feel grievous~~feelings don't matter here, the heart is deceived when it relies solely on emotional feelings. He chastens me because I am His daughter, and He loves me. I have become a much better person because of His love. I've still got a loooooooooooong way to go, but I'm excited about what my future holds for me as He shapes me into His appropriate vessel.

I am looking forward to my church's focus for next year. :) I have attended this church for nearly 3 years now, and every church focus we've studied has been a great blessing to me and those around me. :) We are currently studying Extreme Love; the extreme Love that Jesus showered us with, how to understand that love more deeply; and most importantly, how to express it toward others. It's been an awesome experience. :)

So much to do...so little time to do it. I guess it's a good thing all of us have the same amount of time, but there are times I'm sure we'd like just a liiiiiiiiittle bit more? "Please, Sir...I want some more." : } I'm sure there is even more that I can say because there is more that I think, but I think I'll wrap this up for now. It's been a loooooooong day today.

RANDOM THOUGHTS

There are just so many thoughts running through my head, none of them particularly coherent, just there. Some of them results from emotions, some experiences, some dreams, something someone said, something I've read, some from lack of sleep, some just simply exist.

School starts for the boys 8/23, just a week away from my start of writing this post. I'm saying the word "just" a lot. No telling where this is gonna go. Anyway, the boys are kind of excited, kind of dreading it. Me? I don't know. Sometimes I'm ready for the daily school grind, other days I'm not.

This has been a HOT summer. Too HOT. I realize we've not had "THE" hottest summer ever by any means, but this summer is HOT. I really can't wait for the cold snap of 97 to kick in. What day are we on....16? 17? 18 days straight of OVER 100-degree days??? I'm not interested in being reminded of the oven of 1986. I'm well aware that was the hottest Texas summer in all my Texas existence.

I'm so proud to call myself an American. I thank God, my family and my friends who served in the Armed Forces to protect the freedoms I enjoy here in America. I can't take those brave souls for granted. Maybe that comes from being a military (Army) daughter.

John Hagee has said: "You must USE your freedom to DEFEND your freedom or your LOSE your freedom." Awful lot of truth to this. :( It's a sobering thought to realize that our freedoms are NOT "free"~~sacrifices have been made, people have died, livelihoods have been lost for our very sacred privilege that doesn't exist in any other country.

Freedom OF religion does not mean freedom FROM religion. Right now, evangelical Christians are under fire. Unfortunately, so are radical Islamists (radical Muslims). Whether they want to be or not, Jews are back on the forefront as we have a terrorist prime minster who wants to wipe the Jews and Americans off the map. Unfortunately, Jews are no strangers to wars against other nations, that's been the majority of their existence. However, just as amazingly, the Jews are a peculiar and special people in God's eye, and it would behoove us (Americans) to take note and not abandon her in her hour of need. Not necessarily that manpower will save them, because GOD is sufficient to save them~~AND HE WILL SAVE THEM, but if we are so stupid as to turn our back on Israel (which I pray would be MANY generations later, but fear that's not at all the case), then our fate will fare absolutely no better than any other nation. If we do not defend Israel, God will not see fit to defend us. Many Christians recognize this...all eyes are on Israel.

I am NOT a "homophobe" because I believe the Bible when it says homosexuality is an abomination. I do NOT wish evil or harm to anyone who is struggling or content with homosexuality. Far from it. Some of my friends are gay. I see homosexuality as sin. So is lying. So is murder. So is stealing. So is gluttony. So is witchcraft. So is anything else that God calls sin. However, I don't believe these sins DEFINE the whole person. We ALL have some kind of sin in our lives, if we are ugly and technical about judging ourselves. Christians after God's own heart are FORGIVEN sinners. I believe Jesus truly meets us where we are when we call to Him. Sinners who are deepest in sin enjoy the greatest sense of forgiveness, and I've found they are usually the easiest to forgive others.

I don't understand why certain Muslims are wanting to build a mosque so close to ground zero. I am beyond irritated at Speaker Pelosi for wanting to "investigate" and find out WHO IS FUNDING those of us who DON'T want the mosque there. What???? IT HAS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH "FREEDOM OF RELIGION" or even about TOLERANCE BUT ABOUT honoring the sensitivity of Americans who have lost loved ones from the terrorist attack on 9/11/2001. Just because you "can" do something doesn't mean you "should." Paul tells us that all things are LAWFUL (unto him--now us) but not everything is EXPEDIENT. Sometimes it'd be better if we didn't participate in what is otherwise "legal." Today, it seems that the envelop is constantly being pushed. There is little respect for common courtesty anymore. Instead of it coming naturally, or being understood, people need to be reminded about why something may or may not be "acceptable" or "respected."
Most of those of us who oppose the mosque being built so close to ground zero DO NOT OPPOSE a mosque built at all, we just farther away, a respectful distance, from the site of ground zero. That is all. What is so difficult about understanding this??? lol, saw a line I think is apropos: "I'm not trying to argue with you, I'm just trying to explain why I'm right!"
I understand why some of my Pagan friends seriously mock Exodus 22:18, "Thou shalt not suffer (allow) a witch to live." The OT was taken literally and physically and actually killed anyone deemed a witch or otherwise involved in witchcraft. However, upon reading 1 Samuel 15:23, "For rebellion is as the SIN of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry", we get the sense that God does not intend so much for us to literally KILL the body of those who participate in witchcraft, but for Christians to PRAY for the spirit of witchcraft to be removed from that person's life. From Galatians 5:19-21, the works of the flesh are sin against the Spirit of God and manifests itself in adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, envyings, murders, drunkenness, revelling, and such like...none who participate in these shall inherit the kingdom of God. Jesus forgave a thief on the cross. Jesus forgave a woman caught in adultery. Jesus forgave Saul, who murdered Christians. Jesus cast out demons, allowing the person to live and fulfill his mission in them. Some of my friends have been delivered from the powers of witchcraft and are now enjoying the fruits of the Spirit in their lives.

It's time to study American history. What we have learned in school has been quite distorted~~and what's being taught in schools today is even MORE distorted! I'm almost glad that I flunked AH. Well, I didn't flunk it, but I only got enough out of it to regurgitate it back onto some nationalized test. Schools don't have time nor the means to dig into history as we should. As Glenn Beck said on one of his programs, GET TO THE SOURCE of whatever quote you're trying to learn~~get the CONTEXT of what is going on back in those days. Develop an understanding of the time, the people, and the land of the people.

I canNOT sing Come Thou Fount. It is one of THE most beautiful of all hymns to my soul, but at the same time, I cannot bear to hear it. I develop a SERIOUS case of Niagra Falls syndrome whenever I hear that hymn. The verse that opens the floodgates is: "Jesus sought me when a stranger, wandering from the fold of God; He, to rescue me from danger, interposed His precious blood." To me, that makes His atonement for me extremely personal and at the core of my heart/spirit.

I have sooooo much cleaning to do!! ((speaking of sin/spirit of uncleanness! lol)) Cleanliness has been put on the back burner this summer. I'm looking around my house and find it's TOO MUCH chaos!! It happens sometimes! ;) My boys will be in school soon, and I've made myself quite a list. Wonder how long it'll take me to get it done...I'll be done much sooner when I get off this blog! :}

This post has taken me a full week to write. It's been a busy week last week, and I'm MAKING time to see its end.

Speaking of making time for something, the Lord provoked me last night via my 7yo son. My J7 got my attention last night. He actually asked me if I could read the Bible in an hour. Oh, my!! Bless his heart! :O I had to honestly tell him that I've not even accomplished reading it in a YEAR, much less in an HOUR!! I asked him if he wanted to try to read the Bible in a year, and his response was a very enthusiastic NOD and yes. Wow. I will get him a 16-month calendar (need to refresh mine, too) and we will post on the calendar when we read together. For all my spiritual fumbling around with my boys, I must be doing SOMETHING right! :}

Saw a bumper sticker on a Hummer last week that said: "Yes, this is my truck. No, I won't help you move." Maybe he gets that a lot? ;)

A black kitty has adopted us. She's been with us for a couple of weeks now. She is extremely affectionate. She can sit on laps for hours if we let her! She makes for great difficulty in typing on computers, tho. ;) She seems really attached to every one but T12, he's too nervous around her.

Let's see, first wave of forms are filled out, lunches are packed, clothes are laid out. Gas is in the truck (you'd be amazed at how important that is, even when the school is only a few feet away!), and here I sit at 1 o'clock in the morning typing away like a fool. :} Six hours will pass waaaaaay too quickly!!

I'm looking forward to the day when I can buy QUALITY clothes for myself for greater QUANTITY of money. Tried to do a little shopping today and it just didn't work out for me. Grrrr.

On this note, I believe I will simply say a prayer for the Lord's favor to prepare friends for our students, stamina for the teachers, and a continuous hot coffee for the parents to enjoy sans children! Maybe it won't hide in the microwave so often tomorrow. :)

Blessings to all of you,
Estelle